Will someone please explain cruises to me?

Because I’m over 55, I qualify for a modest discount on the humongous new cruise ship, “Oasis of the Seas.” It’s the world’s largest. This thing was just finished and weighs 220,000 tons. It carries 2,100 crew members and can accommodate 5,400 passengers.

Oasis of the Seas offers a casino, two rock climbing walls, a movie theater, and 1,900 cabins with verandas (there are almost 3,000 more cabins without verandas…for the poor people). Oh, and there’s a chapel, too. Huh?

Oasis of the Seas is too big for the majority of ports in the Caribbean. This means it sails around a lot and never lands anywhere. You can hop on this ship for seven days and stop at only one beach: Labadee, on the coast of Haiti. This beach is isolated and surrounded by barbed wire in order to keep out the Haitians.

You don’t want poverty-stricken Haitians destroying your vacation, do you?

Oh, there is one other stop. It’s a fake port created just for tourists. It’s called Casta Maya, just north of Belize. You will never have to worry about bumping into any indigenous people here, or foreigners, or riff-raff that beg for money or rob you. It’s sanitary, like Disneyland.

Just think. You can spend seven days on the world’s largest cruise ship, swim near barbed wire and shop in a fake tourist city. And never have to meet anyone different from yourself! You’ll never have to see how the Mexicans and Puerto Ricans and Haitians really live.

Oasis of the Seas is truly an oasis!

Now, will someone please explain cruises to me? Am I missing something?
--Brad

Throw the Bums Out!

Jesus was not fond of money-grubbing persons. The kind and gentle Jesus carrying that little lamb in his arms? Well, we need to counter that kindergarten picture with the fed up Jesus kicking the money-grubbers out of the temple.

It always amazes me to observe so many conservative Christians moaning and groaning about abortion and gay marriage, and yet saying nothing about greed and self-centered money-making. These Christians protest healthcare reform and yet roll over and allow private health insurance companies to rip them off at will.

They hold “tea parties” to protest taxes when they should be marching on the headquarters of Blue Cross/Blue Shield and Humana. It seems that any talk about setting up a system to serve “the common good” is labeled “socialism.”

I’m pretty sure that Jesus was not a socialist, as we define that term today. But I’m convinced he wasn’t a capitalist. And I’m also convinced that if Jesus was walking the earth in person today, he would be throwing people out of the temple.

First, Jesus would walk into congress and toss out all the elected officials who take bribes. He would throw out the politicians who are in bed with the lobbyists.

Next, Jesus would go to Wall Street and blow it up. He’d take a sledge hammer and whack all their cute little computer screens that they stare at all day while every day Americans are struggling to make ends meet.

Then Jesus would visit the big banks, like Goldman Sachs, and toss out all the CEOs. Everyone else in the place would work for minimum wage and would have to cancel their plans for their new swimming pool and BMW.

Then Jesus would go to the churches that are making millions of dollars off religion. You know, these are the “mega-megas” with rich preachers and TV shows and a DVD industry. These are the churches that are so tied into the capitalist mentality that making money off Jesus seems to be the American thing to do.

Throw the bums out! --Brad

Adam and Eve. No Joke.

A lot of jokes have circulated about Adam and Eve. For example, what did God say after creating Adam? Answer: “I think I can do better than that.” Here’s another one: Why did God create Adam first? Answer: Because he didn’t want any advice. We get a chuckle from these jokes.

Adam and Eve are tailor-made for late-night comedy and bad jokes from the pulpit. But there are some things about the Adam and Eve story that really hit home. There is something ecumenical about Adam and Eve. You don’t have to be Jewish or Christian to appreciate the story. It’s universal and applies to everybody.

Here is my spin on it.

Adam and Eve represent humanity. They are all of us as we try to understand ourselves, our relation to nature, and our relationship to God. In their story we see potential glory become actual tragedy. This is a shift from “dreaming innocence” to moral awareness and ambiguity. Isn’t that us?

We move from childlike innocence to harsh realities. Some of us do this very quickly. We move from simple, pat answers to tough decision-making. We leave the protection of Eden and are thrown into a world of suffering and death. The “good guys” don’t always win, and people don’t always live happily ever after (except in romantic comedies).

We make mistakes. We learn things the hard way. The main theme of our life seems to be the loss of innocence and the desire to return to Eden. There is in the human heart a desire to go home again. We want to return to something we’ve lost. This makes us restless and sometimes sad.

I often see this in the elderly as they come to terms with their limitations. They want to go home. They’ve had enough of “muscular” living.

But when it comes right down to it, most of us don’t want “dreaming innocence” for very long! There is no way to develop character without freedom and risk. If sin is the misuse and abuse of freedom, taking responsibility means the right use of freedom. We aren’t robots. Despite potential glory, it is really actual tragedy that makes us human. This is what we see in Adam and Eve; we see them “growing up” and becoming human.

But we also see God’s grace toward all who are guilty, alienated, and ashamed. It’s called salvation. --Brad

Too much in touch?

Okay, let me get this straight: Americans are sending 4.1 billion text messages a day. This figure is from CNN (10/30/09). It doesn’t include twittering, instant messaging, or phone calls. Prayers are not included, either. We’re at the point when even a phone call takes too much time. I picture the future as a time with no face-to-face relationships; only screens and tiny buttons to push.

I’m teaching a Modern History course right now, and we were discussing our technological age. Students mentioned the Internet and the Web, cell phones and texting, twittering and instant messaging, and the quick access we have to information 24-hours a day. Then there’s Facebook and MySpace, etc.

One woman said, “I get all nervous when my boyfriend doesn’t text me back right away. I feel rejected or like maybe he’s avoiding me.” Apparently her boyfriend is required to stay in touch every nanosecond.

No one’s life is that interesting every second. This applies to great love affairs, too!

Have we gone too far with this connectedness thing? Is it possible to be too much in touch? I call this “the ambiguity of technology.” This means saying yes and no to technology at the same time.

I don’t know where I would be without my cell phone, and yes, sometimes I use it while driving. Bad boy! I like my flat screen HD-TV. I like grading papers electronically rather than using hard copies.

But while technology is wonderful, technology is not so wonderful. Yes and no. Nothing is wonderful when it begins taking charge of our whole lives. Nothing is wonderful when we don’t have time for face-to-face relationships with family and friends. Nothing is wonderful when we don’t have an hour for exercise or quiet time or a moment to just sit.

Nothing is wonderful when ring tones assault us every few moments. I have a colleague at work who has a different ring tone for every person in her life. Every time her cell phone “rings” I want to smash it. She thinks it’s cute.

Many of us, if we are honest, are looking for a place to hide. We’re tired of being “too much in touch.” So the next time you start to send a text message, ask yourself, “Is this really necessary?” Maybe it is, but maybe sending thirty text messages isn’t! --Brad

The Kingdom of God and the Sick

The kingdom of God is what happens between us and the sick. This insight came to me from a comment made by Jurgen Moltmann in one of his books. Moltmann was talking about Jesus healing the sick. The healing power of Jesus was a sign of the presence of the kingdom of God. When the kingdom arrives, illness flees. When the power of God’s Spirit touches the sick, they are healed.

Where do we find the kingdom of God today? The kingdom of God is what happens between us and the sick.

I’ve been in healthcare ministry a number of years, off and on. There are times when I want to avoid the sick. I want to do something else. Why? Is it selfishness on my part? Perhaps, but most of the time it is fatigue. Ministry to the sick takes a lot of energy, a lot of self-giving. It can be draining. Jesus had moments of fatigue, too. He took brief “sabbaticals” and went off by himself to pray and recharge his batteries.

And yet we can’t overlook this point: in the expectations and suffering of the sick we encounter the kingdom of God. And we learn. Visiting the sick is not only about “meeting their needs.” It is about meeting Christ in the sick. It is about receiving the hospitality of the sick. It’s about seeing ourselves in the sick. And it is about learning faith from the sick, even from those who have little faith.

I can honestly say that my understanding of the kingdom of God has been deepened by the sick. I’ve been pushed, challenged, humbled, and made more grateful.

None of this would be the case were it not for the Holy Spirit working in and through the sick to reach me. Could it be that God has asked me to minister to the sick in order to save my own soul? Probably. So we press on . . . and we find the kingdom of God happening here and now in every Spirit-filled encounter with the sick. --Brad

Boo! A story about salvation.

One day a colleague at work asked me, “Do you believe in hell?” We were alone at the office. It was the end of the day and we were catching up on paperwork. Her question hit me by surprise. I realized that God had just dumped me into a very important moment in this person’s life.

I said, “No, I don’t believe in a literal hell. I think hell is a metaphor for separation from God, for missing our destiny.”

She answered, “I don’t believe in hell either.”

This woman had just enough of old traditional Roman Catholic theology to be scared and guilty. She was carrying a lot of baggage about sin, hell, and eternal damnation. She was all tied up in knots, spiritually and psychologically. In some ways she was like a kid who has been told, “There’s a ghost in your bedroom closet! Don’t go in there!”

I call this “Boo!” theology. God sneaks up on us and shouts, “Boo! You’re going to hell!” Would you do this to your friend? Then why do we think God does this? Fear-based religion is running rampant through the minds and hearts of millions of people.

Anyway, this woman said, “I sure hope I go to heaven.”

I asked, “Do you want to go to heaven?”

She almost shouted, “Yes!”

“Then you will,” I replied.

She looked at me like I had just hit her in the head with a piece of firewood. Stunned. Apparently no one had ever told her that she was secure in God and needn’t worry.

We carry our own demons with us in our heads. We create our own hells. Often those demons have been placed in our psyche by distorted forms of religion, by “Boo!” theology.

I believe that, in the end, we get what we desire with all our heart. God gives us what we desire with all our heart. To desire “heaven” is a metaphor for desiring salvation, peace, joy, life, and ultimate freedom. As we mature, we might even begin desiring God himself. And if we really move forward in our spiritual growth, we will even begin loving God.

Once God’s love hits us between the eyes, we will never doubt again. We can cease the childish and fear-based obsession with personal salvation and get busy sharing the “good news.”

It seems all day long all I do is go around telling people they’re saved. The “Boo!” theology flying around out there is incredible…too many scared people. There’s lots of work to be done. --Brad